just cause im bored as fuck.

because im really bored and have nothing else better to do, i guess this is going to be some sort of memoir of the guys i slept and almost slept with. i contemplated about using their real names.. but i cant give a fuck. besides, they can call me up all they want and yell at me but im pretty sure 90% dont have the fucking balls to do it anyways. and all abt the threats of ruining reputation crap, do you even have a reputation?!

i dont understand why i actually met him twice. TWICE. i must have been either really drunk, on drugs or brainwashed. oh wait. actually i was being nice and kind and decided to give this idiot another chance at redeeming himself, to prove that he is really not an idiot but clearly, he is. he can hardly hold a decent conversation and i could not understand what the fuck he’s saying, it’s like staring into a speaking martian and like wtf?! and he goes on and on about how he’s working for ralph lauren.. blah blah blah.. IT.. blah blah blah.. i really dont fucking care ok? i just wanna have fucking sex with you and if you want to have a conversation, please talk about existentialism, human rights, things i care about but you’re probably too shitfaced to find out and be interested in anyways. so i and him had sex. it was.. mediocre. most of the sex i had previously were mediocre anyways. what can you expect from a mind numbingly fuckwit anyways? and he goes on and on about how he “created” this sex position. ermmmm. yea right. over my dead body. and the number of girls he slept with, he told me it was like 16-18.. *rolls eyes. so the 2nd time, i got so fucking pissed off at him cause every little thing he did was moronic in my eyes so when he decided to flush the condom down the toilet which wasnt a smart idea cause the condom could have gotten stuck and clogged and what the hell was i supposed to do and explain?! i was living alone, clueless, a little naive and in shit loads of trouble. what a thoughtful guy. i ended up yelling at him, calling him fucking stupid. really, that’s it. i just yelled, told him what an idiot he was and to get the fuck out. the worst thing out of all this was he continues to msg and does that fucking annoying miss call shit (where he rings for like 3 seconds and hangs up, i’ve no clue what the fuck is his problem. he is definitely not broke so what’s his point?) me over the period of 9 months EVEN when i moved to aus. i msged him back once to fuck off and does he really have nothing to do but to spam me with useless msgs? does he really have thaaaat many free msgs?!!? and his reply was, “yes, i’ve 2000 msgs. so what’re you doin baby?” O.M.F.G. (13)

Lesson Learned: it’s a waste to give another chance to idiots or any guys really and dont get any more involved with guys who cant even hold a decent conversation cause clearly he has no fucking clue what he’s talking about therefore, he will have no fucking clue what he is going to do in bed. sooo if his name is chester and he’s like half spanish or philio or something. avoid at ALL cost.

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wet and sticky

you know what it’s fucking erotic for me?

having mr b to watch me getting fucked (nice and hard, please) by a guy (highly preferably with a penis similar to mr b’s) in either missionary, another variant of missionary or doggy till the point where his blood rush and testosterone level raging, pushing the guy off me, sliding easily right into me and fucking me even harder.

that’s so fucking hot #1.

awakening him with a blowjob. it gets nice, wet and hard. the gorgeous sleepyhead woke up to find me getting on top of him and sliding onto him, riding him to near orgasm.

that’s so fucking hot #2.

anyways, mr b and i saw safeway trolleys at my floor and i thought it would be funny to take the trolley into my aptment then i realized im gonna have a stupid room inspection so we took the trolley out. i’ve pictures as evidence i came to the realization that im horribly shitty at CS cause i got killed in less than 1/4 of a second a plethora of times however! i can kick mr b’s ass at dead or alive (some rp fighting game) and burnout3 (fucking awesome game. i love road rage!). tee-hee!

i took some awesome pictures of graffiti i saw at this inner street and some fucking sheeps had to stalk me and take pictures too. will post them up soon! they’re really fucking gorgeous!

i love acmi.
my internet can be such a fucking caged cunt.
so overdue on my cross-cultural communication essay due in like 7 hours but im heading to bed and doing it 3 hours before it’s due. i know. im fucking awesome

making my panties hot; that’s if im wearing any.

just when i thought my sex drive has dwindled into a black hole, it has gladly been revived this afternoon. honestly i thought that my sex drive has died along with the sex destitution during my 5 week stint in Spore (the story with misashi is another thing) much less having my period as soon as i got back AND having my pussy disappoint myself and mr big do not help at all. having languid sex does equalize to having no sex.

but today. wow. the nympho is back for a sequel. i love how he throws me onto the bed, how he holds my wrists above my head, how he makes me scream into the pillows (never really thought i was a screamer until he became a literal beast at doggying) etc. my new found passion is now trying to find different positions of riding except that i’ve the physical capacity of (insert any obese person’s name). today i discovered i particularly like reverse cowgirl except i couldnt really got around to riding per se nevertheless, it’s really so much fun to play with the balls and perineum. yes when it comes to copulation, i enjoy to be thrown onto the bed, be forced down upon & be fucked like a dirty whore.

the night at bubble (vip tickets, baby!). haha. didnt end too well. i ended up regurgitating the wine and champagne i drank after acting like a stupid child; sitting on the floor and refusing to bulge which apparently (according to mr b) led to 6 friggin security coming to bother me. i remember having one security point his friggin annoying little “toy” flashlight at my face (TRYING TO BLIND MY RETINAS THERE?) and someone telling me to stand up. so i did and went to the toilets to puke while mr b thought i ran to the streets and he got into a taxi trying to find me on swanston street. silly billy. i would think mr b would be slightly pissed off at me cause i was pretty shitfaced (though i sobered up when we left) and cause he wanted to stay a little longer but i would hope the after sex made up for that. i hate being stuck in the going-to-be-trashed-but-not-really phase which ended up me being shitfaced, pissed off and pissing everyone off.

pretty much everyone who clubs in Melb smokes, snorts and/or pops. haha. the two guys in front of us during the line were hilarious. his friend being all fucking paranoid about getting caught and wanting to take a walk to calm his friend now where the friend openly took out speed and insist on snorting it at the lineup. the friend was clearly shitfaced from some other drug which he said it’s alcohol. right, we believe your bullshit. i heard you saying you were gonna get a massive amount of pills when you head in. oh, all you lovely druggies.

im still seeking (it’s starting to get a little desperate here) for the bisexual/lesbian for the 3some; this need reminds me of joey (god. there’s like 2 joeys, 3 joels, they are all starting to merge and confuse me!) and all the lesbian actions/thoughts to be foreseen or done but that’s for another day for me to pent down and/or wank to. i’m finally starting to get the rhythm back. it’s nice to get my train of thoughts and strong sexual inclines back

p.s.
does anyone know of any possible (side) effects from swallowing multiple shots of protein (almost) daily?
i think im gonna need to search it up soon meanwhile, advice/responses are greatly appreciated!

cookies, stained sheets and love

apparently according to The Boy, the place which im gonna get my tattoo at is a tramp stamp. yes tell me wtf. saturday night was mostly awesome. sometimes i feel or think that i might be addicted to it but im pretty sure my addiction to The Boy and sex are more lethal and oh, instant noodles.

with the whole drama going on with The Boy and his friends, im dealing with none on my own; besides the usual
- samy trying to miss her flight
- the whole joke with samy and shawn. god. people can be so fucking stupid. lmao.
- dee and the whole kissing episode
- the wed mos night. bad cheryl, bad. a first and last.
- I LOVE SARAH AND LENNE! sarah; we need to actually not trim/shave/cut/whatsoever. the next trip when i head back. lenne; im awaiting. kiss kiss.
- calling ZY an asshole which he really was. it’s pathetic to see him to try and defend himself
- having the moment with irvin.
- finally breaking off with ben
- the thing with alvin.
- im sorry D.! haha. and that wed night, i mistook you for someone else that’s why i sent you semi rubbish smses. lol but i was still sober. just that i often have memory lapses with life and i didnt get back to you cause i got totally trashed after that.
- no bday sex for alvin; god i know too many people with all the same names that’s why i keep messing them up, thinking one is the other. lol.
- the summer hookup gone wrong with JY
- realizing me and LS aint all that close really..
- barely talking to my Father at all. best r/s would be long distance where all forms of communications are not needed unless necessary.

i think there is something very wrong with me.
i want you.
i want him.
i want it.